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Thursday, June 11, 2015

SELF DETERMINATION

In my coming books, i will talk about a woman who came to see my friend in his office. She was timid and afraid, and I knew immediately that her husband was physically and emotionally abusing her. I asked her why she put up with it.

She thought there was some kind of spiritual growth in her suffering. Like there was a lesson she had to learn. There was. But it wasn’t about allowing herself to be abused. It was about learning to stand up for herself and change the situation.

In her case, she had fallen into the victim role associated with the past-life fear of inferiority. It’s a tough one. We all know what it’s like to be stuck in a situation, unable to see a way out of it.

There is an answer, however. It’s the motivation of self-determination. The whole time she was allowing herself to be a punching bag for her husband, her soul was pushing her to stand up for herself. It was saying, “Here, take this. Use this motivation to stand up for yourself.”

I don’t know what happened to that poor woman. I never saw her again. However, I’ve helped hundreds of people to find that inner strength to stand up to bullies, to develop a whole new level of self-respect, and to recognize that they have the power to radically improve their own lives.

The block with any fear, and the reason people often don’t hear the small still voice of their soul, urging them to change, is what’s called the Illusion. The Illusion is the barrier between this plane and the next. Being in thrall to the Illusion is the reason a person will put up with an abusive relationship. They think this is just the way things are.

When you access a motivation, you will have the key to personal transformation. It will allow you to take any fear and begin breaking free of its grip. Motivations are karmic, as I’ve said, so I should probably take a moment to talk about karma.

First of all, karma is not, as some think, punishment or some kind of divine retribution. It’s simply a way to balance the effects of negative experiences between one life and the next. Motivations are karmic because when you apply them to a past-life fear, you create balance.

The principle works like this: You have a past life in which you were oppressed, given no chance to exercise your free will, or you lived your life according to other peoples’ wishes. In this lifetime, your default mode will be one of submission, codependence or, like the lady I described, victimization. This is the past-life fear of inferiority. When this fear strikes, it robs you of your inner strength, and even the awareness that you have the power to change your circumstances.

A common resonance, or symptom, is the inability to stand up to others in an argument or when there’s conflict in a relationship. Have you ever had a partner walk all over you, and wonder afterwards why you let them?
The fear of inferiority usually creates a feeling of inadequacy. It will have you comparing yourself to others. “I should be married by now,” or “I’m not as smart as everyone else.” It can manifest as submission, codependence, passivity, jealousy, or feeling a victim of circumstances—like you’re stuck and can’t change things.

When the fear is triggered, often when a situation causes you to compare your life to others, your soul will respond by urging you to respond to the threat. It does this by bringing the motivation to your consciousness. The motivation, as I said earlier, is self-determination.

Self-determination pushes you to become proactive in changing the life you have and creating the life you want. This is how so called “victims of circumstance” will overcome an addiction, leave an abusive spouse, or stand up for what’s truly their right.

The shift can be immensely powerful. It’s the reason we talk about someone having “turned his or her life around.”
You identify the fear, find the motivation, and healing can begin. Some people find the motivation without every consciously knowing what they’re doing. For most of us, however, we could use a little extra help in this area.
Conscious action is the key. Being proactive, creating the shifts you need to heal, and doing it for yourself, instead of hoping something or someone will come along and change things for you.

During a session with a client, I’ll look for a past life where the soul has developed the fear of inferiority. Sometimes, all it takes is to remind the soul that “that was then, this is now,” and it can begin healing immediately. Coupled with a few simple exercises to engage the motivation of self-determination, the past-life exploration can lead to profound personal transformation.

You can always change things. Through the motivation of self-determination, you’ll never find yourself immobilized, waiting for someone or something to come along and change things for you. You’ll take charge of your destiny. And when you do, you’ll learn to run your own life, and achieve deep and lasting self-respect.

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